THE HITCHHIKER'S GUIDE TO OPERATING SYSTEMS

Four operating systems for the people who replaced their phones with portable payment terminals just to feel something (the warmth of a physical keypad).


Butch Debian

A version of Debian Linux that boots straight into Tomboy Notes and contains no other applications.

The GUI is provided by a fork of TWM (Tom's Window Manager) called GIWTWM (God I Wish That Were Me), making the venerable window manager more approachable to users more accustomed to full-blown desktop environments like XFCE, Plasma or Windows 95: without compromising it's lightweight nature.

that's all she wrote :P


Winnebola Linux

The creators of Parabola Linux, no longer content with being the deblobbed version of Arch Linux, have branched out into making their own SteamOS derivative.

Instead of relying on Steam and KDE Plasma it ships with Kodi and Wine.

The former fills the role of fancy game launcher, the latter providing the desktop environment and facilitating compatibility with Windows games.


Yousai

Translator's Note: Yousai means Super Dimensional Fortress Macross

This operating system is presented as a security-hardened version of Haiku: but is actually an OpenBSD install image that contains just enough components to run full disk encryption, lock screens and a Haiku virtual machine (complete with accelerated graphics).

At some point the "boot straight into a VM"-setup will be ditched in favor of a Wine-style compatibility layer, to improve performance on low-end systems.

You can use this operating system to virtualize many other operating systems, but this is not supported (it works and the setup GUI fully accomodates it, but the community won't answer your support questions if something breaks.)

(the same thing happened when I tried porting Wine to 9Front)


Dakimakura

Translator's Note: Dakimakura means Hug Pillow

One particularily devoted Yousai user has started porting the project to smartphones, with a codename that builds upon the ancient swedish joke of referring to mobile phones as "yuppie teddies".

The lead developer has publically lambasted the GrapheneOS project for its devotion toward the megacorp-controlled Android ecosystem.

He has also spoken out against the hypocrisies of postmarketOS: the fact that it based itself on Alpine Linux to keep the base system small, yet still embraces unwieldy projects like GNOME, Flatpak and systemd (when it should be adapting GIWTWM into a touchscreen GUI and building more Alpine Package Keeper packages).



Notes

all joking aside, I would gladly use any of these as my daily driver if they existed for real

(maybe not Winnebola: even if that one still fills a certain niche)

i haven't tried 9front (or it's precursor Plan 9) yet, so I can't vouch for how difficult it'd be to run Wine on it (technically or socially).

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